I’ve always been fascinated by the lifelong journey of our personal growth. Over the last few years, I’ve decided to learn more about myself, live a more meaningful and fulfilling life and focus on enhancing my wellbeing. Certainly, there isn’t a fixed, clear or fast way to achieve that...we are all different from one another, which means that each person needs to discover what works for them and create their own personal growth journey.
We all reach a point in life when we may feel out of balance and it’s difficult to know what to do. It all starts with the desire for change and when making the decision to commit towards your self-development make sure to understand that this is an ongoing process, a commitment to yourself, which will take time, however, the results can help you in all areas of your life. Whenever I come across something which I believe to be interesting, meaningful and transformative, my passion leads me to share it with others, hence writing this article.
I’m also a strong believer that no acquaintance is accidental. I was fortunate to meet Jane Reeves a few years ago through common friends. Ever since we met, every meeting with her has always led to fascinating, deep and meaningful conversations. She possesses a combination of excellent humour, an open mind and a high level of self-awareness. She is an excellent listener, very intuitive and has the gift to offer alternative ways to view things. What’s even more fascinating about Jane is her journey becoming a Transformative Life Coach, what inspired her to do so and what exactly is TLC.
Share with us your journey to becoming a transformative life coach. Why and how did you choose to become a transformative life coach?
I got into personal growth by “accident” 18 years ago. I was always fascinated by human behaviour and wanted to be able to evolve each passing day. Nothing seemed to work deep enough to have long lasting effects, until 2015 when I came across the three principles after falling into depression because of (what I thought at the time) my work as a police officer. I then contacted a friend who I knew was a psychologist. Little did I know she had transitioned into TLC. Right after my first session I had no idea what happened but something inside me was stirred in a way that was very transformative, and the journey still is after all this time.
What is the difference between transformative life coaching and mainstream coaching?
Most coaching practices are outside–in, meaning they use steps, strategies or techniques. Transformative Life Coaching (TLC) is an inside out understanding based on three principles. Basically, one deepens their understanding of their life experience which in turn gives the ability of fresh new thoughts elevating the quality of the experience of life. This gives profound insights into how one’s life unfolds, giving better clarity, calmness and overall mental health.
What are the benefits of transformational coaching?
Understanding how the three principles work can be transforming each person differently. The reason I can explain in a paradigm: Imagine each person is a vessel with a unique and different shape. The principles are like water. Once they are purred into the mind, they take the shape of the person’s vessel. So, each person can benefit were they most feel they need it. In general, though what someone gains is clarity, calmness and a better understanding of life.
Do you have someone who inspired you during this journey?
Tatev Petrosyan, my own Life Coach who I first went to, is definitely a catalyst in my journey, and there’s no way I can thank her enough for guiding me into becoming a Life Coach. My own students/clients have also given me inspiration by sharing their experiences and insights. After that really anything and everyone can be an inspiration.
What has changed for you since you were introduced to transformative life coaching?
This is such a small question but hides a huge answer. I could talk about it for hours because of so many changes. The root cause of any change I went through though, is a change in my understanding. Understanding any situation now, comes from a deeper level and it makes a big difference in my life. Most of us understand our situation via our personal thinking and our personal thinking is shaped by past experiences, our culture, religion, family, school and the society in which we grow. Our reality is created based on this personal thinking. This is limited and as I like to remind people at our sessions, what defines you, confines you. Once my understanding started shifting about my personal reality, my reality changed. It's not that "mine" anymore. It's less personal and so my suffering has lessened.
What is the most challenging part of being transformative life coach?
The most challenging part is not when I am coaching, although there are some moments definitely even when coaching. The hardest part of it all is to not coach people when they did not ask for it! I find myself trying to coach friends or people who I am just having a conversation with. It's the force of habit, I guess. I am getting better at it now, but at the beginning it was hard. Ego gets in the way many times and I think to myself, oh I know how you should/can do this. And so, I fall into my Egoic trap of supposedly me knowing. In reality, I think I know what you need, but you probably don't want any of that. You just want someone to listen.
What are your core values as a transformative life coach?
Just as any person can have many core values, so do I. There is not enough space to share them all ☺ but if I had to choose one is authenticity. What I mean by that is not to be different or extraordinary but rather to be truly connected to myself, to notice what comes up within and be truthful about it. For this to happen I need to be open to understand how I feel, to be honest with myself about how I feel and to be vulnerable to share how I feel. This trinity of inside action naturally makes a person authentic.
How does your transformational coaching tie into adventurous activities and travelling?
Adventurous activities or travelling can become way more meaningful and fulfilling through the three principles. They can be more spiritual if you like. Suddenly a tree can be so much more than just a tree. You see life happening through you, rather than at you. So, it is less “aggressive” in a sense. Through the three principles, you understand the meaning of living in the Now and this makes the experience of life richer.
What is the most satisfying part of your coaching experience?
The overall experience is satisfying because it feels like watching a person waking up to life and I get the honour to be the one that wakes you. The most exciting part of that is the very beginning. When a person decides to take the plunge. The person usually has no idea what they are about to get. I know the effects of TLC and it is like a pleasant surprise I have for them. It feels like the moment you give a gift to a friend and you are watching them unwrapping it and can't wait to see their reaction!
What are some things you feel grateful for?
In general, I feel grateful just to be alive and be able to witness this experience, not because everything is positive or I am always happy, but I have this innate curiosity about life, like a 3-year-old. So even the unpleasant moments or moments of pain, I, like everyone else, have the ability to go through them gracefully without getting dragged into the drama. I also feel extremely grateful for having people around me to share this life, like friends and family members that I cherish.
What inspires and motivates you?
Anything can be inspiring. Anything can be motivating. Once you open up to the infinite possibilities of life the most mundane thing can have meaning. So, there is nothing specific for me that I can say oh, this is inspiring. It's not a fixed thing. One day I am making my coffee and it is the most motivating thing to do, next day it's just a coffee. The level of consciousness we have at the moment plays an important role.
What makes people choose transformative life coaching?
I have no idea. :) I know for myself that I accidentally chose it. I just stumbled upon it. It worked for me and at the beginning, I thought the whole world should learn about this. My mind was blown, and I am still thinking sometimes why someone wouldn't choose this? What people don't realise is that they have the power to overcome anything. Nature is self-correcting constantly. We are part of nature, like a wave is part of the ocean. So, there is a self-correcting mechanism inside us as well, which we don't acknowledge. Someone should choose TLC because they would get to learn how to use this innate ability, this natural gift that is within each and every one of us.
How can someone reach you?
On my Facebook page, Instagram and you can find my personal phone number on both pages. If you are curious and would like to get deeper fill in the following form to get a personal response https://forms.gle/UFSJnN61Z1urgDUQ7